Frank X. Gibson (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} p_frank) wrote,@ 2008-10-06 00:39:00 |
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Movies Continued
We ended up renting Balto 3 by accident. We were after Balto 2. Apparently what we rented is better than Balto 2, according to IMDB. IMDB are a bunch of liars. I have not seen Balto 2, but I know for a fact it is impossible to be worse than Balto 3. A capably animated film by whatever horrid Korean studio was forced to make, its story, characters and horrendously slow pace manage to decimate what good will this piece of trash may have had. There is a whore duck, there is a "mentally challenged" (their words, not mine) polar bear who speaks like a deaf person sucking on helium. It is the worst, avoid. It's not bad enough to be funny.
Lion King 1.5 AKA Lion King 3 (they said it was an "all new feature" in New Zealand, but it is in fact just a bunch of recut footage). The animation was competent possibly due to the amount of money they saved by re-using footage. It is a terrible movie, made even more terrible by the main characters being Timon & Pumba doing a MST3K riff on the original film.
We also saw the latest opus from the director of the Lion King, Haunted Mansion starring Eddie Murphy. What is most depressing about this film is that the sets are beautiful and there was a huge amount of potential. Whether it be a campy horror film that can play to kids ala Goosebumps, or an inspired take on a ride like Pirates of the Carribean, or even if it was a wall to wall comedy, it would have been so much better.
Instead we get some of the most beautiful sets I have ever seen, accompanied by poor acting, boring writing and a total lack of inspiration. This is a boring film. Eddie Murphy fighting Zombies would have brought me to the cinema in the 90s. But now it is just awful. Avoid at all costs. One cool thing was that they played spooky sounds over the credits and I thought that was so much mor einteresting than the usual songs they play over them, then BAM! Nelly kicks in with another southern rap jam. Fuck that movie.
We ended up renting Balto 3 by accident. We were after Balto 2. Apparently what we rented is better than Balto 2, according to IMDB. IMDB are a bunch of liars. I have not seen Balto 2, but I know for a fact it is impossible to be worse than Balto 3. A capably animated film by whatever horrid Korean studio was forced to make, its story, characters and horrendously slow pace manage to decimate what good will this piece of trash may have had. There is a whore duck, there is a "mentally challenged" (their words, not mine) polar bear who speaks like a deaf person sucking on helium. It is the worst, avoid. It's not bad enough to be funny.
Lion King 1.5 AKA Lion King 3 (they said it was an "all new feature" in New Zealand, but it is in fact just a bunch of recut footage). The animation was competent possibly due to the amount of money they saved by re-using footage. It is a terrible movie, made even more terrible by the main characters being Timon & Pumba doing a MST3K riff on the original film.
We also saw the latest opus from the director of the Lion King, Haunted Mansion starring Eddie Murphy. What is most depressing about this film is that the sets are beautiful and there was a huge amount of potential. Whether it be a campy horror film that can play to kids ala Goosebumps, or an inspired take on a ride like Pirates of the Carribean, or even if it was a wall to wall comedy, it would have been so much better.
Instead we get some of the most beautiful sets I have ever seen, accompanied by poor acting, boring writing and a total lack of inspiration. This is a boring film. Eddie Murphy fighting Zombies would have brought me to the cinema in the 90s. But now it is just awful. Avoid at all costs. One cool thing was that they played spooky sounds over the credits and I thought that was so much mor einteresting than the usual songs they play over them, then BAM! Nelly kicks in with another southern rap jam. Fuck that movie.
